Third Loop

[onewizardwolfpack]

It hadn't yet dawned on Remus what was causing the event to start again. All he could think was if he turned around, Greyback would turn him and if he ran fast enough, Greyback would kill Harry and Sirius. He didn't know what to do.

He turned. That was one decision made. It meant he couldn't run, that choice was off the table. He could feel himself shaking, though it was still warm out, and he stared at the grass and trees until his eyes adjusted.

"Come on, then," he said, and was startled by how small his voice was.

"Come on."

"You don't sound afraid," Fenrir said, breaking off from the shadow of the forest and moving forward, staying a big grey shape that smelled like bad, primal things.

"But I smell it on you." Remus swallowed. He wasn't really prepared for the exchange. Violence, yes, blind panic, he could have managed. Looking Greyback in the eye and standing his ground wasn't something he had ever, ever wanted to do, not ever again.

"You're an animal," he said quietly. "I know I can't stop you. But it doesn't matter. I'll never be like you. Even after you turn me, I'll still never be like you. So, come on."

He balled his hands into admittedly tiny fists and his eyes glittered with suppressed emotion as a strange, rushing feeling built up inside of him. He didn't run. He could see Fenrir's eyes turning strangely reflective, knew the change would be on him soon. How fully had Greyback embraced it, that he didn't even look uncomfortable?

"Let's have it done."

Comments

[blackedout]

Naturally, the loop begins again. One moment Sirius had been racked with pain and adrenaline, the next the absence of it has all but slammed into him, it's so abrupt. He's back in the office: Mess, photo, chair overturned as he sprints to the hall, Harry.

Sirius lifts a surprisingly steady arm to point at his messy-haired godson.

"You get Remus or you stay here," he bites out, almost feral, fear and frustration making him edgy. They'd been so close to losing him last time—Far, far too close. If there's one thing Sirius refuses to accept, it's Harry putting himself in harm's way for Remus or himself. That isn't how this agreement is supposed to work.

[theboywholived]

"I'll get Remus," Harry snapped, determined and dark as he strode down the hall, a man on a mission. It didn't matter that they had done this twice already, in lightning quick succession. Failing and restarting only made Harry more stubbornly fixed on seeing Remus safe and untouched. He understood in a removed sort of way what Sirius was saying -- his concern for Harry as well -- but Harry didn't give a fuck, not for Sirius' sake or his own. They wouldn't fail again.

White knuckled as he gripped his wand, Harry sprinted out the door once more.

[onewizardwolfpack]

It had to hurt, Remus thought, watching Fenrir stalk through the tall grass at his leisure, the bones and muscle already changing under his skin. It had to hurt. He was certain he could see a sheen of sweat on the man's skin. He could smell it, certainly. Everything in him rebelled at being so close and not running. He felt sick.

"Suppose you're smart," Fenrir was saying, "knowing that running wouldn't help. Still. Disappointing. No fight in you."

No, Remus thought, knowing the years of dank basements and empty flats that stretched before him after this night. The loneliness that he'd duck into and accept.

No, there was no fight in him.

He felt magic, though, raw and fledgling, still. If he had a wand, or. No, no matter. Fenrir fell forward onto his hands, nails splitting, growing, digging into the Earth and Remus didn't move. Only watched.